The doctors let Kay come home today..... even though she is still very weak and has to keep her feet elevated. Since she is on disability and public assistance, she told me they could only keep her in the hospital "for so long", then she has to leave. I guess they have their rules for a reason, but she's still so sick.



I plan to run over to see her sometime tomorrow and maybe take my mil with me. It'd be good for both of them. Maybe I'll take some more melon and peaches. She seems to tolerate those ok.

Thank you, Margaret. I'm sure I would love your daughter, too! I talked to Kay about 30 minutes ago; she had a bad night. Said she started with a horrible headache last evening and add to that an extremely painful right foot (with the blisters, etc.) She can't keep any food down, even though she tried eating. You'd think they'd bring someone in ICU something edible! She said they brought her turkey tetrazzini with noodles and other "heavy" food. I'm sure she'd love some jello or something light. Maybe they will catch a clue. ??

This morning, when we were talking and she was telling me about last night, I said, "You have a headache right now, don't you?" She hadn't mentioned it, but when prompted, she admitted she did. See? That's the way she is; she doesn't complain. But, you can just hear it in her voice.

Maybe they'll bring her some more ginger ale for her Scooby Doo cup?

I appreciate everyone's support here. Also have passed it along to Kay. Thank you all so much!

Oh, by the way, Melissa -- no, they aren't talking kidney transplant or dialysis YET, even though they HAVE tested her daughter to see if she is compatible and she is. Her daughter (Sharon) was the first one to come up with the idea and has already volunteered to give one of her kidneys to her Mother, if need be. I'd give her one of MINE, if I could.

Janie, I just found the post about Kay. I am sorry she is ill and I definitely said a prayer for both of you. I was happy to read that she seems to be improving. Maybe you will get that miracle that you were hoping for.

When you were describing Kay, you were also describing my daughter. I love to be around her because she is always happy, cheerful, funloving, always the life of any party. So, I can just picture Kay as being just like her. Everyone wants to be around people like them, because they are where the action is or maybe it is that the action is always where they are. Anyway, they just seem to draw people to them. I don't have that quality and I envy people who do.

I hope she gets the help she needs and you two have many more years together as best friends. You are right they are few and far between. M

Brenda,

THANK YOU, honey!! Your words are very eloquent and heart-felt.

I truly appreciate your warm wishes. You are very special!

Since I tend to have this "loner" personality, my true friends are few and far-between. AND, I (like a few others here) tend to keep my true/real feelings hidden.... like they'll just "go away" somehow.

As for Kay, I've known her for over 20 years. Funny thing is: I couldn't WORK with her. We didn't see work ethics as "eye to eye". But, hey!! After work, we'd always have a great time. I was the "more serious" person; she was the "let's party" person. Looking back on it all, we blended quite well.

OK, back to the real world. Kay is someone who (in the past) drifted in and then out of my world. She was a travel agent in the past. She seemed to know everybody in town; she knew how to get from "here" to "there"; knew how to entertain fashionably and put on the AIRS when needed. The one thing "I" knew about her was that, deep deep down, she was a little ole girl from Wilmington, NC. She was a people pleaser and her job(s) fit her well. She had and STILL HAS a warm, loving heart and spreads it among many friends. I am happy to be a part of her world. She calls me "sis". She never had a sister, only a brother who died last year from brain cancer.

She lost her Mother a month earlier than I lost mine. Her Mother was in the very same nursing home where I placed my Daddy. (Didn't know that until months after Daddy was placed!)

She knows so much about me, as I said before, and loves me in SPITE of it. She's a friend. A really great friend; a soul mate. She's had her share of problems, personally and professionally. But, she stays true to the course. She is a very special lady.

I wish all of you could meet her; you'd love her! (Did I mention she's a "kwaazy lady"? We laugh so much together.) What a great memory of our times together.

[ July 04, 2002: Message edited by: JanieR ]

Janie, My electricity keeps surging but I am going to
write this to you. You have been through so much in
your life, way too much for you to handle without your
best friends at the forum. It is the cruelest thing to
face death. It is even more cruel to face the death of
a soulmate. With Kay a piece of your soul will go to
heaven to keep her from being alone. But it is not time
for that so rest your mind and be with her today.

The one thing that has attached my soul to yours is
your compassion and your need to reach out and touch
every soul that touches yours. I am hoping that Kay can
recover and get well for her sake as well as yours. The
thought of you losing one more person in your life is
not fair. It is fate that ultimately decides what life
holds, but I would like to believe that our prayers can
help. brenda

Hi Janie,

It was the strangest thing. Was just thinking about you. So I was just scrolling around the forum and stumbled into this thread because I saw your name. (I never really entered it before because my ancient computer took too long to load it.)

And then I learned of your best friend's condition. And your condition. Believe me, I will be praying for her AND for you. I am so sorry this is happening. Your love for each other is clear.

My heart is with both of you.
Try to enjoy the moment.
It really is all we have.

Love,

Joan Marie

OH YES, Scooby Doo!! Thanks, Kathie!

I just called the hospital and talked to Kay. She sounds a little groggy, but says she feels "some better". She's still using the cath. and they've had luck with that. She's in the ICU, maybe for another day or two. They said if she gets better, they'll allow her to go back home.... 'til the "next time."

I asked her if she'd used her Scooby Doo cup yet. She laughed and said all her nurses had gotten a huge "charge" out of that and when they bring in her ginger ale now, they just pour it into the "SD" cup. She told me I had brightened everyone's life there. Can you believe her? Even horribly ill, she is still giving to me.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Melissa M.:
Janie- Here's a prayer they give her a miracle. Those family members who aren't biologically related to us can really wrap their hearts around us, can't they?

---

I know this is true because someone made a miracle for me today and it wasn't a biological family member, but one of my chosen family members.I'll keep sending prayers your way!!

Janie-I'm so glad your buddy is doing a bit better-hope they pull her through this crisis. I gotta hand it to modern medicine on one thing-they have technology that can do wonders at times. Here's a prayer they give her a miracle. Those family members who aren't biologically related to us can really wrap their hearts around us, can't they? I feel for you,J. Keep us updated(when you can)-Take care of yourself,too-luv,Melissa

Janie, It's " Scooby Doo". You know ,I know ,all the kid stuff.I want to go see the "YaYa Sisterhood" movie too. I read the book and the prequel "Little Alters Everywhere" and loved them both.

Hello< Well I,ll try again.

Peace to you and Kay. Kay is so lucky to have a friend like you.

Take care stay cool. Eleanor

Got home a few minutes ago from the hospital. Kay looks a little better. They have inserted a catheter to drain her urine. She looked so pale when I first knocked on her door. Then, when she saw it was me, she brightened right up.

I'd stopped at Wal-Mart to get a "few things" for her. A huge bouquet (silk) of Sunflowers; an incredibly soft white bunny rabbit with a pink bow around his neck; and a child's insulated cup with screw-on lid and straw. For the life of me, I can't remember the cartoon character on the top, but it was the dog movie that's out right now. Probably as soon as I hit Add Reply, I'll remember. Oh well, doesn't matter.

She LOVED the sunflowers and the bunny. Told her that since she had to leave her kitty cat at home ("Casper"), she'd probably need something to hug. She laughed like crazy when she saw the "Marmaduke" (????) sippy mug.

Then ............... she looked at me. Her eyes were so full of love, I wanted to cry (and I did.) I tried to lighten the mood and said "Hey! Don't you look at me like THAT!!" (I wish we had a "bittersweet smile" icon.)

She said, "well, if I can't look at you, at least I can hug you." She is something else. And, you know what? She knows everything (almost) about me and loves me anyway.

Vicki, are you for real? The reaching out of love and compassion of your post made me cry. See what you went and did!! Thank you, honey. I KNOW you meant what you said.

Thank you all, each and everyone of you. By the way, Kay and I were supposed to go see the "Ya Ya Sisterhood" movie on Friday. Told her, "This is ANOTHER fine mess you've gotten us into, Ollie. She just laughs at me.

Janie,
I'm sending prayers to you and Kay. I know how much you love her. I'm crying as I think about what you are going through right now. Losing your best friend is heartbreaking. When Mom died I lost my best friend. I'm here to tell you it does get better. The pain feels like it will never stop but finally it starts to hurt a little less. We are all hurting right along with you, Janie. Please continue to share with us what is in your heart. We want to comfort you any way we can. We all love you, Janie.

Vicki

Janie, I too am so sorry about your friend.My prayers will be with her and you. Real friends are few and far between(You know who you are) and it is so sad to lose one of them. I lost one of my very best friends about 2 years ago to lung cancer, that had then spread all through her body. She was 49. She and I used to go out partying all the time,and even when she was so sick and had lost all her hair to chemo, she still had the best positive attitude and sense of humor.She was dx in March , hung on till a long planned cruise for her and her husband's anniversary(no children) in Oct. Had a wonderful time on the cruise, got back and died at home 3 days later from liver failure.I was so glad she got to spend that last bit of time having a good time with him.He had told her if she died before their cruise ,he was going to take her ashes with him and she would have to go anyway.I miss you Donna!!

I'm so sorry about your friend,Janie.The type of friends you can call at 3a.m. and they are ready and happy to talk to you as long as you need are hard to come by and very precious.The ones you absolutely never doubt will be there for you.I wish I knew something to say to make you feel better, but sometimes theres just not much you can do but say I'll be praying for you and your friend both, and sending you strength. Love ya Janie-Melissa

Anybody got a couple of extra prayers? If so, my dear, dear friend Kay could use one of them.

She was admitted to the hospital last night at 6:00 pm. Kidney failure.

I went to see her last Friday. Her legs ankles and feet were so swollen and she has blood blisters on the bottoms of her feet and they were beginning to form on the tips of her toes. She'd had one of the bottom ones lanced and had bandages all over.

Bought some groceries and carried them in for her, since she can't walk - let alone drive. We visited for a little while, as I was putting the groceries away. We laughed and joked (a HUGE part of our friendship) and then we got serious and she finally told me her physical condition.

She is NOT one to be the first to tell you everything that's "wrong" with her; you almost have to drag it out of her. But, she knows she can't fool me. I can see it in her face, or hear it in her tone of voice.

She called me Monday evening and we had a nice "chat". She called me again yesterday morning and we had the EXACT SAME CONVERSATION. I thought this was odd, but went along with it.

Then she called me again at 5:15 last evening and told me she'd called her doctor and he admitted her to the hospital.

She's scared. I'm scared. What will we do? Without each other ...

Boy, I sure hope they'll let me keep this image!!

Wow guys! People really have a problem with differences of all kinds, don't they? I know kids can be cruel that way(gotta fit in syndrome) but you'd like to think adults would grow out of it. Guess not!
Wouldn't the world be boring if we were all alike!

Janie, I don't think you needed to tell us a little accent self-hate thing would keep you from posting! And thank goodness for that!!! I love y'all and your accents and everything else that makes y'all unique!!

My ex-husband is from New Jersey(Still there) and I really used to get teased when we would go and visit. Everyone except his Mom teased me . That's because she is Japanese.(Really) You should have heard them tease her about her accent.Even her own kids . Ruthless.My son still laughs when he thinks about her asking him if he wanted another borony sandwich or more flied lice.

Melissa, I'm so GLAD to hear that Debbie is feeling better today. Let's hope it lasts!!!

Regarding "accents", I hate (well, totally DISLIKE, anyway) mine. I won't even leave an out-going message on the answering machine! When I was in the eighth grade, my family was x-ferred from North Carolina to Ohio. The English teacher I had used to LOVE to hear me talk and always picked me to read OUTLOUD in English class. One time she just looked at me and said, "Talk for us." Yep, Margaret ... just like you. A real good way to shut me up. (Don't anybody here get any ideas!)

Nice thing about typin' is that we all sound the same! Well, sorta' ...