Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

My friends tell me I have too much time to think, but . . . .I HAVE QUESTIONS! We thought we would know the answers as we grew older . . . Naaaaa

Why do Fat Chance and Slim Chance mean the same thing?

why do the drive through ATM machines have instructions in braille?

quote:

If a tree falls on a mime, does anybody care?

Or hear them

Oh I think I remember another...
Why do bathroom cleaners say spray in a well ventilated space?
If it was well ventilated we wouldnt have mold and mildew

Why does 7/11 have locks on the doors if it's open 24 hours a day, every day of the year?

Why do "Aweful" and "Awesome" start with the same prefix but have completely different meanings?

If a tree falls on a mime, does anybody care?