Yesterday I had the rug pulled out from underneith me....MIL's facility is gently suggesting she may have to be moved. She is in a fostercare home and the owners husband passed away a month ago and the owner feels since she is by herself at night she would not be able to get MIL out of the house quickly enough should there be a fire. She said if the state came and gave her an emergency test they would insist we move MIL within 12 hours. Also, MIL has not been baring any weight and one of the cg's hurt her back so they are complaining about that also.....This is almost the same scenario as the last facility, they complained about the lifting also although the main reason we did move her was their lack of good care. I had a hoyer lift delivered months ago but they will not use it. I asked about it and they say MIL throws a fit when they try to use it. My daughter is a cg in a local nursing home and lifting is second nature, she said she never thought of complaining about lifting someone, it's just the way it is with the elderly. Why am I having this problem? This is a wonderful place, I don't want to move her, ever. My DH says to not worry until they insist as the owner might just be compaining (blowing steam) and will get over it. I layed in bed last night thinking of what we will do and maybe I should rent an apt and between me and hiring help we could care for her that way. I know MIL is a pain as she will not sleep for long periods and they are constantly up with her at night despite medications. She won't stand but will sit up in bed and slide onto the floor and the owner will have to call someone to come help plus she won't stand and when they do lift her she puts up a fight. This is the pitts.

Connie,

Most elders in care in Oregon from what I understand from Senior and Disabled Services social worker wind up on Medicaid due to the high cost of nursing home care.

If your mom has no more than $3500 in assets that can be converted to cash she qualifys. Have Senior and Disabled Services do an assessment for you if you are paying this out of pocket. Many facilities once the elder has been a paying resident, will accept the medicaid if they are approved by the state and feds as a care provider. You can call the Alzheimer's advocate if they give you a hard time.

You can check to see if they are an Medicaid / Medicare approved provider on www.medicare.gov

Connie,
This may be a fair way to handle the situation with your MIL. If she does require more care they should be paid more. Having to move her at this stage would be very hard on her I'm sure.

Vicki

MIL's facility is a foster care licensed here in Oregon as a level 3, very rare for a foster care home. According to the owner a level 3 is able to have a resident like MIL. I have never looked into it myself and have only gone by her word. They are able to have up to 5 residents and right now have 4 full time and 1 temporary. MIL is the only one that is full care, the others pretty much get around on their own but do have health problems, 2 use walkers. There are 5 cg's on staff including the owner, 1 full time RN (Canadian license) and the others are part time aides. The owner is there most of the time although since her husband passed away she is probably gone more doing the shopping and errands he used to be in charge of. I am confident the local nursing home could not do any better at care as the ratio is 11-12 residents to one aide days and swing with a lower ratio during the night shift with 1 RN per shift (40 residents). It is attatched to the hospital. I do realize the foster care staff has to do alot of household chores along with resident care but it seems there are always at least two people there during the day, they have a bi-weekly housekeeper and hire the outside work out. The nursing home refuses to give bed baths for one thing and the staff does not have time to give very much one on one care, something MIL thrives on. Hospice and home health recommended this facility when MIL had pneumonia 6 months ago because they are very impressed with it. According to the foster care owner she has discussed MIL with the powers that be and she has the states support in keeping her there, at least that is what I am being told. The extra $$ is to include extra hours for help as MIL needs two people for lifting and clean up and has to be fed or prompted to eat all of the time including drinking a beverage (she seems to forget how most of the time). As of now she is paying approx. $1400 more than the other residents, enough to pay the extra hours needed for MIL. Friends, I appreciate any insites you could give me as I may not be seeing the whole picture. All I can think about at this point is I don't want to move her. I will if I have to but the thought devistates me.

The facility your Mom is in is most likely considered an Assisted Living facility and they are not licened by the state for the level of care your Mom requires. I have to ask who is caring for the other patients while they are caring fopr your Mom. someones care may vewry well be suffering as the level of care your Mom needs is rather intense.

Hi, update is MIL is staying along with a $1000 increase in her rent (no meeting, just handed me the bill) ......somehow this has magically fixed the problem with the firedrill (she said she had a talk with the state and they are giving her some room on this rule), suddenly they have used the hoyer from time to time and MIL is fine with it if she is sleepy. I told her I felt like this was punishment for my asking them to put MIL in the recliner or put the tray on the w/c, cg said that is what made her start thinking MIL was requiring a lot of their time and care as it requires a lot more lifting. She says MIL is very needy and they want to give her the attention she wants, that is how they have won her trust. The $1000 is; a flat $600 increase in care fee, $350 extreme lifting fee and a few other add on's. The dr has ordered some type of special cushion for MIL's w/c and, in his opinion, she can sit in it for long periods thus nixing the recliner. He also changed her meds to try and get her to sleep at night. He also said he had to negotiate about the hoyer and said it was fine to be used in extreme situations only because cg says she fights it so hard. CG says she called various facilities to find out what the going rate was for someone needing full care which gave her the guidline for the increase. So we went from approx. $2700 to $3700 in the blink of an eye. My DH says to look at it like we have been getting a hell of a good deal for 6 months. Anyway, it is a longer story and I won't bore you. I refuse to get mad, it isn't worth it and MIL has plenty of money. The bottom line is she is getting better care than ever/she is deteriorating and this facility is very good at caring for dieing people and no doubt they do deserve the money and MIL has it to pay. Connie

I have had experience were the person , nurse, did notknow the proper way to get someone in the car.I did it my self.The one thing they teach you at a rehab center is this.It amazes me .But they are desperate for help these days so your qualifications are not as stringent as they once were.

Did you see where the problems of staff disease are so bad?This has been going on for years.You may go in the hospital for something minor and usualy get a staff infection.

I know I'm staying home,don't want any dummies messin'with me!!!!!!Everywhere I worked there were several lifts & the CNA's knew how the work them.......

Connie,
What is the latest on your MIL? Will she be able to stay where she is? I agree with Jim. How can they work a t a care facility and not know how to use a hoyer lift?

Vicki

Connie,

Are you telling me here that the staff there doesn't even know how to use the hoyer lift?

Amazing--I'm so glad to have a doctor with hair on his or her you-know-what to get things done

Bravo Buddy

I just received a call from MIL dr.. He assured me they would do whatever it takes to keep MIL in this facility and will be calling the owner today to discuss options. He suggested having the physical therapy dept go out and give a class on using the hoyer lift, changing MIL's sleeping meds until we find one that works and he will be working on other options. He told me not to worry that we would find a way to work this out. I just love this man and his assistant, they are always so comforting and willing to help. I do feel much better and I am so glad we have this team; dr, family, cg's who care--so wonderful.

Thank you May for your support, you are a Sweetheart.
Connie

Cjh, sorry to hear of you having to face this problem.It seems we feel we have our house in order and something happens to through a wrench into it.To rent an apt tRY TO RELY ON A ASSISTANT IS SO DIFFICULT.What happens when the person , if you find someone, decides she wants to leave.This scenero leaves yu open to so many added worries.Until you get the request to remove her I would let her stay.I would take this time to look for another care facility.

i HAVE TALKED TO MANY THAT SAY THE ONE THING THAT THEY HAVE TO DO IS LIFT A PATIENT.Ihave a friend, who worked in a care faility, she was told if te patient is to heavy for her just to let them drop.She choose not to take this course and now is suffering with many problems brought on by lifing.They need to be taught how to do the lifting.With my aunt they would sometimes have 2 but when 1 did it they were qualified.My heart goes out to you.It seems we are never given piece of mind for any length of time.I would not make this decision under pressure.Give it some serious thought.The stress of being responsibile for anothers well being is over whelming.,

I will add this:When the nurse moves my aunt from th bed to the wheel chair she does it so easily.She has been well trained.I have to use the slide board.Whe she would slide down fron he walker , I would have to call a neighbor to help.She is dead weight and I have enough back problems.