Thanks all of you. Please say a prayer for Mike-he is gone. He died peacefully sitting at the table -the HS worker was trying to get him to eat some yoghurt (breakfast), the worker suddenly realized Mike had stopped breathing-no pain or struggle and he went at home with Sandy and me close by. The dr. was coming for a home visit but ended up doing a death certificate- I felt bad for him too. I still can't believe it. A friend just left and my bro is coming tonight. It seems so unearthly quiet.

KarenF.Hello.There are so many of us who have been concerned about you.Please let us know how you are doing and how hubby is doing.

Dearest Gypsy,

I am so sorry to hear of Mike’s passing. You were one of the first caregivers I met here on the forum, and you uplifted my spirits more times than you ever could have known, with your positive posts about your life with Mike and Sandy. I know they were not always bright and sunny, but you know what – most of them were!

I hope I can have as much compassion during my own travels as you have had with yours.

((((hugs))))
Karen

Gypsy, you were such a top notch caregiver for Mike.You made his life so normal in all ways.You did what had to be done to take him where ever you needed to go.
You kept him acive physically and emotionally.
You gave him the strong stimulation that kept him going.
Now the trick is to stimulate our selves in the same way.
Takes time to get past the routine we have become accustomed to.
I will look to you for strength as I know you will find the way

quote:

Sounds, or types, weird of me to say you are lucky

I know it does but it is true. We were lucky even the doc said yesterday that it was one of the most gentle deaths he had seen. Even he said it was almost as if Mike did it his way. Said we'd never know but he wondered if it was possible. Mike always had a strong, sometimes stubborn personality-makes you wonder if with a little help from above it was his way. Don't think a picture of the collage would work very well it has a plastic cover and is pretty big. so think the individual picts would be small. Many of the picts are from my Webshots albums the addy is in my profile.

Hi Gypsy,
You got it right when you say "at least he got to stay HOME till the end". That is the ultimate goal of every human being. Sounds, or types, weird of me to say you are lucky. I hope that doesnt sound mean. I just wish I could have done the same for my grandma. If you make a collage is there a way you could post it online and share with us? If that is not what you want then i understand. My heart goes out to you. Thanks for helping us all.

You're right Diana. I didn't know Mike when I was doing my world travelling. But it is neat looking at all our trips mostly in western and northern Canada. I'm looking at a collage I made for yesterday-realized that Mike really did have many good times even after his stroke. I became much more aware of taking pictures of him. It helps to see him smiling. It is hard to think he is really gone but I think the way it happened helps and the fact that he did get to stay at home till the end. Should get to bed as it is almost midnight.

From one Gypsy to another... I understand your feelings. I have a ton of pictures of nature too... but I remember when and where "we" took them.
We were blessed with the opportunity to travel with our spouses, and those travels made our marriages stronger. Be sure that the bond created between Mike and you in those many hours spent in far places will be in your heart forever.
A big hug.

Diana

Sometimes the "after" is so much harder than when you are going through the first few weeks. Seems like there are alot of phone calls, visits but when everyone starts getting back to their own things is when the reality hits hard. My prayers are still with you for some peace and comfort in the difficult days ahead. I hope you will find comfort in your memories.

Just reread all these messages(with tears) It has been over a week. I have tried to stay busy but every so often I just feel numb-not as much now that his daughter has been gone for a few days. Sat. is a gathering here of friends and family-he didn't want a service. I have been going through old photos -made a collage-funny I realized I have few people picts. from before the stroke-both of us were more into scenery and animal picts. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers they are truly appreciated.

Gypsy, My thoughts and prayers are with you.
((((((HUGS))))))))

Hi Angel, I saw your earlier post and was going to reply but just didn't get back to it. You don't need to type a bunch of fluff-the hugs and thoughts are appreciated. Things certainly feel unreal. I broke down at lunch-was with the friend that introduced us over 30 years ago. We were in the cafe at the bakery where I go but had never eaten at-the owner said if we wanted to come for lunch he would help and put up a little ramp(or we could have eaten on the patio when it was warm enough-we just never did it.He had never met Mike and didn't know he had passed. We had just got our lunch when he started singing with the kareoke(sp) he sang ONE song at that time "The Gambler" we have the tape, it used to be Mike's favourite. I said it was Mike letting us know he was ok. It was strange-he never played anymore until a little boy came in then he sang kids songs. Gotta go eat something for supper.

gypsy,
What else can I say besides what everyone else has said? No typed words can express the real emotions. I am sorry. I know everything must still seem "unreal" right now. Not gonna type too many "fluff" words because I know you are busy doing what needs to be done...and trying not to break down. Wow, it is weird to come to this site again and realize how many cyber-friend caregivers have lost their loved ones. My mom always said she was a gypsy so I always used to read your posts just because of your name and the fact you seemed so understanding and non judgemental. I send many hugs to you and i am not going to type anymore because i know that you know I am sorry for your loss. You did a good job and I hope you are proud of yourself

Thank you all so much for your warm comforting prayers, hugs and understanding. I know you are "here"even when I am alone. I may not be around Fri to Mon. as Mike's daughter is coming. Everyone is so helpful. My bro was here last night and went with me to meet with the funeral director. He had to go home this pm as he had an important meeting.It was snowing here most of the day, not sticking.

Such a great loss for you. I hope you find comfort in the prayers, support, and love you have being sent your way. Hearts are breaking for you and your loss...those same hearts will love and support you through these times and I hope and pray you feel that comfort; along with all the hugs everyone wishes they could give you in person.

Oh Val,
I am so sorry to hear about Mike. I will add him and you to my prayers. You were one of the first people I met and admired how much you loved and cared for Mike. Sending you love and hugs.

Gypsy, words cannot express. Wishing you love and peace.

Oh VAL... {{{GIANT SIGH}}}

{{{{HUGS}}}

Val your in my thoughts I am so sorry.
We are all with you in spirit surrounding you with love and comfort.

quote:

Originally posted by gypsy:
Thanks all of you. Please say a prayer for Mike-he is gone. He died peacefully sitting at the table -the HS worker was trying to get him to eat some yoghurt (breakfast), the worker suddenly realized Mike had stopped breathing-no pain or struggle and he went at home with Sandy and me close by. The dr. was coming for a home visit but ended up doing a death certificate- I felt bad for him too. I still can't believe it. A friend just left and my bro is coming tonight. It seems so unearthly quiet.

Val, honey ............ I guess it was "meant" to be this way. Mike and you and Sandy. You were there when he crossed over. I could only have wished for such for the loss of my loved ones.

You must be in such pain; I wish I could help you in some way. Glad to hear your brother is coming.

I love you, honey. We've known each other for many years. Through your sharing on here and your photos. In a way, I feel I have truly known Mike.

Still remembering the photos you took of him during your many travels .........

Stay strong, my sister. You are very much loved.