well, he went to Dr. today, and really blew it and walked out when she asked me if he has been angry since his encephalitis w/stroke. I told her no, the first 2 yrs. he was emotional had trouble w/word search, but for the last 2yrs he has been having wicked angry outburst which last 2-4 days, mostly just toward me.Thats when he slammed out of the office. They will be setting up a MRI for him to compare the cat scan they done in 2000. Even so, i know he will still not take any pills. He is now talking divorce and want his money (ss). We have been married for 47yrs. The first visit, she asked him around 6 questions, one was the date, he got that right, but the yr. he said was 54 and the others, he didnt even understand the questions. Will take one day at a time, (if i last that long) willy

thanks everyone, i'll keep you posted. ps my friends call me willy

Ettarp, we all have to tell those little white lies to get what is best for the one afflicted.I do not think of it as lies , I see it as survival for them and us.It would help if hubby could be given something for his behavior,My hubby takes seroquel , not large dose, it helps.My husband displays that nasty behavior toward me, most of the time.I have learned to seperate my self from him when he is this way.This behavior is not him and at that time , he is not my behavior.I think you learn to build this wall with your feelings as a means of protecting your self.When one is overwhelmed it seem to bother one more.When it becomes too much, I walk away and tell him I will return when he settles down, I do just that.You have to put some distance between you and him when it seems he is attacking you.If possible, go out side and get a better perspective of everything.The more you give him a forum to insult you, he will continue.There is always alittle of the normal personality present.What you do is you change the way you respond.You take charge of the situation

ettarp, If you're able to get hubby in for the MRI that'll be great. But I would suggest that you try to arrange it with the doctor that you get a whole work up done at the same time. I remember how hard it was to get my dad and my mom in for anything. Dad would get particularly angry and foul mouthed, which was scary, and he appeared as though he would become violent---although he never did.

Anyway, it turns out that mom has dementia but my father was only diabetic. So, be sure to get the sugar checked, at least! Blood sugar that's out-of-wack can do scary horrible things, and no matter what else may be going on, blood sugar problems can only make matters worse.

my best to you,
maria

Hi Mae, he was always some what a controlling man, but never talked to me like he has been these past 2 yrs. He went to a new neurolphyscic (sp). I had to tell him a white lie to get him there and now i don't think hell go back. How long has your husband been sick? and how do you even get used to him yelling. Thats what I'm having trouble with. I know hes sick and its really not him thats talking like that, but boy, it gets me so upset. I also have chronic crohn's, so you know where i spend most of my time. (that is also good at times when hes having one of his bad days) They also didnt call today about that MRI, so i try and reach them Mon. thanks Mae, willy

ettarp, these emotional systems sound like my husband.Did you take him to a gp or a neurologist?My husband has seen me as the enemy since his illness, began,.I have grown use to it and just let him talk and in time he changes to another topic.Most of his topics and concern revolve around ythe business he once had and believes he still does.