It's good to be back after my old computer broke down and it took me nearly two months to get a new system ordered and up and running with the new Windows Vista. Hours on the phone.
Anyway...I just realized that hubby does not talk about the future except for one thing. He buys 2 lotto tickets a week expecting to win big so that he can buy or build me a home that I can manage with my fibromyalgia and arthritis. All the easy conveniences, etc. This is the only thing he talks about in regards to the future. I go along with it, making suggestions, etc. just to keep him interested in at least something.
He reads, but not as much as before. He sleeps more and more and so often just "does not feel good." He does go shopping with me, but it is getting to be more and more of an effort for him. Lots of times he just tells me to go straight from the Wellness Center gym.
Bobcat, you make a lot of sense. I do know what you mean be preserving dignity. I let hubby do those household chores he considers his, filling ice cube trays, making lunches, and carrying out trash. I just grin and wipe up the counter spills he ignores and quietly fill ice cube trays when I know he isn't feeling well. Right now, this system is working well. I know the time is coming when he will gradually give up some of this and I will have to pick up and do it. He still grocery shops with me, and I dread the day when he doesn't. But that's life, we just go on. Thanks a bunch.
Farmgirl, My Mom is 92. Maybe I'm in denial, or not. She had some signs of dementia years ago, but after some adjustments in meds, the addition of some prescription vitamens and a LOT of one on one daily stimulation, the verdict is that she is old. She doesn't always care about the things that jump to our mind as priority. She is simply old and has her own agenda right now. Not everyone has dementia as they age, except for forgettfulness (Lord Knows, if you go by that, I'm already there).(and there is plenty I'll LIKE to forget). Sometimes, they just need physical help, and a lot of love. Mom won't tolerate being treated as a child and we don't try. But she needs physical help as a child much of the time. We try to protect her dignity as much as we can. You are talking about your spouse, which is very different from speaking of a parent. I will back off here . All I can say is not all aging includes disease, but most includes priorities of attention. Mom will not always pay attention to what I want her to, but if I pay attention to her, and what she wants, she makes sense. If you haven't already, please have the hearing checked. It makes a huge difference.
Betty, thanks for your input. I have looked at sites dealing with Alzheimers and symptoms. From what I read, I don't believe hubby has Alzheimers. He had a great checkup a few weeks ago. The forgetfulness and mild confusion seem to be products of aging; he just turned 87. I believe his problems, sleeping so much, etc. are due to aging and just wearing down. I just wondered if anyone else has experienced this with their loved one.
