Need some suggestions! Mother-in-law refuses to shower, change into clean undies, or wash her hair. I have just ignored it since she gets quite angry if I insist but it now has been almost two weeks since she showered! Her hubby is having the same results but at least he got her to sponge bath this morning. I have a shower stall with a chair, rails, and a hand held shower so it is not difficult for her to get in and out of the shower. Should I treat her as a child and say " no breakfast until you have showered" of what? I have showed her where and how to use the baby wipes but she doesn't remember, of course, and she doesn't like me to come into the bathroom while she is there. She doesn't need the diapers yet, just doesn't clean herself well and soils the panties. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks, Edythe, I'll give that a try.

Having difficulty getting someone with Alz. to shower/bath is not unusual. In general when showering there is a lot of different things going on in a small area with someone generally close by while you are in the nude. This is often more than what anyone with Alz. can handle. then you add having to step in and out of a tub/shower along with wet surfaces, changing tempertures with someone watching you while you are in the nude it is a wonder that we ever get our LOs to bath/shower at all.

To be honest if you can sponge bath a LO at least daily getting the areas more prone to be soiled/wet or smelly than you do not need to shower/bath them that often. Well for that matter as long as you can sponge bath them yuou can get by without showering at all. However most of us still feel better if we can get them to shower at least once a week.

It can help to leave your LO in their undies or wraped in a towel while bathing. Keeping the bathroom warm and shuting it off to a/c air many times helps. Warmed towels after a shower can feel comforting. Smelly soaps can also help sooth. If this still fails then try giving them a sponge bath in a larger room like the bedroom.

Thanks, Vicki for the quick response! She doesn't seem to be afraid of the water, just doesn't like getting in and out of her clothing..often sleeps in it rather than putting on her night gown. The shower is not white so I don't think it is a depth problem. I don't have the records yet concerning her evaluation but think she is in stage 5 and a little of 6. Just took her to the Dr. today here in KY but she didn't have any suggestions; don't think she has had too much experience with Alzheimer's. In fact, when I called the support group here, they did not have any suggestions on a doctor specializing in AD. In Florida she was diagnosed with AD but those are the records I don't have.
Dorothy

Dorothy,
She may be at the stage where depth perception is a problem. Sometimes the white of the tile is scary to someone who can't see very well. Have you tried to find out why she doesn't want to shower? There are some cases where the person is afraid of the water. If she is uncomfortable with you helping her shower can you hire a home health aid to come in and help her?

Where is she as far as being evaluaded by a Dr? Have you asked him for advise?

Vicki