During my last post, many made great suggestions on how to get things ready for Nonna to come live. Is there a site or thread solely related to that? I am trying to think ahead and plan so I don't have to double back to fix things. I am a 36 year old SAHM with 3 kids, one who is going to a college program this year and is only 14, one in PS, and one that I will homeschool. I walk around with a spiral binder to keep things in check. I am a list maker and it helps me to see my goals and accomplishments. I am a bit of a control freak. It helps when the bottom falls out to know I can go back to the list and keep things in order. That said, here is where my list starts and I would love for anyone with experience to add to it. There should be a Topic/Thread dedicated to just getting ready. I have NO clue and I am certain that there are a lot more out there like me getting ready to change their entire lives. This is long term and most Americans aren't raised with extended family living in the house. Growing up in our family was a mentality of "us four, no more". Spending time in Italy as a teen changed my mind. Marrying a Thai man cemented it. However, it doesn't change not knowing how to move forward in the American society of leaving the elders to fend for themselves in Florida. Know what I mean? This would be a great book even. "The Idiots Guide to Elder Care"? What do you all think?

Here is my starter list.
1. No carpeting. Solid surface, non-slippery flooring.
2. Level entry with double doors directly to her room from outside.
3. Pocket doors from inside into her room.
4. Induction cooktop with auto shut-off.
5. Walk in shower with bench.
6. Main level living including laudry room and kitchen.
7. Suite style room with enough room for bed, couch, portable closet, chair, tv, computer desk & sewing machine.
8. Trying to get lawyer referral, now.
9. Took care of final wishes and keep that on file. Her kids are NOT going to be happy when they see her choices. I may really need a lawyer if they find out.

Next?

i'm jumping in rather late but when we made daisy's room we replaced the bedroom door with glass door with a curtain. during the night we can peek in and see how she is doing without disturbing her. she is beyond needing or knowing about privacy so it is very helpful to be able to check up. also, on ebay for very inexpensive are the baby monitors, video, so you can be in another room and see what is happening. this may be premature for you but others have wondered about it. it is also good for caregiver monitoring as they do have the ones that can be very discreet. also good for a nursing home situation to get one that records. there are also motion activated ones that record but those are a little tougher to come across on ebay, might have to be special ordered. if the government can do it so can we.

I just thought of another thing. One feature that our LO enjoyed and used a lot was an overhang on one of the counters, like a breakfast bar. It was counter height and we set a sturdy counter height stool there. We put her phone on the wall next to the chair.

The counter height stool was perfect for her to be able to sit while on the phone, lower than a bar stool but higher than a dining chair so it was easier to get back on her feet after sitting. She used that spot more often than her dining table, and I suspect it was because of the stool height being more manageable for her. Plus, the counter itself was a very stable thing to grab onto, being attached to the cabinets and the wall.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: T.O.R.P.,

I agree with MB about the flooring. My home is mostly hardwood and tile, and I love it. But it's a little drafty and cold in the winter. We manage that with area rugs, but when our LO was still mobile with her walker, we had to roll up the rugs whenever she was in our home because of the tripping risk.

Her ALF and now her SNF both use a commercial type of carpet. It's warmer and gives them better traction, but has a low loop so that it doesn't interfere with their walkers or their tendency to drag their feet.

One thing that none of these places has had, but I wish they did, was a locking cabinet. When we had to take over our LO's meds, we didn't intially lock them up but then we had a couple of incidents of her meddling with them. So we had to purchase a cash box with a lock. Later, other items such as scissors that we occasionally needed, but that she wasn't using good judgement with, were added. A built in drawer or cabinet for such things would have been a convenience. (We tried putting things in a basket at the top of her closet where she couldn't reach them, but an aide walked in one day just in time to catch her climbing onto the seat of her walker to reach the top shelf.)

Very true about changes Caregivers are always adapting to a new situation at any given moment.
You can begin a list of things and by the time your through with it and think your hot (been there!) and on the trail your LO's needs change.
I can tell you my safety list grows all the time when it comes to the health and welfare of my MIL. Sometimes things look safe to leave out and then you find out how crafty our LO's can get with the items so they go on the "Mental No No list"
The only reminder I post "Keep doors locked"
this keeps all the dangerous stuff out of reach from our LO's
That is the only rule that stays constant in this house

What MB suggests on planning, sounds much like what we here call an in-law's addy. An efficiency apartment of a sort with acsess to the main house through the kitchen or family room. Love the ideas of the seperate ventalation. Seperate heat and cooling thermostats. Seperate entry. At any time in the future, this is office, returned kid, escape area. All to the good.

Glad the site is safe on funding, Still, if a volume of "Elder Care for Dummies" were to be published, this site would deserve it's fair share of royalties.

After all. I feel like I am a dummy chasing after Elder Care Info. and getting it , too.

Xina, searching the ECO site can locate MANY great tips. In addition to this forum, the main page of ECO has links to many articles and sources for just this kind of information. Your local home health or rehab sometimes will even come to your home and make suggestions that are specific to your home and needs.

Because everyone's home is different - sometimes VERY different - and the patients for whom we care have vastly differing needs and abilities, there is no ONE thread for discussion of the topic nor one right way to do everything. Things that are appropriate now may not be later on and vice versa. Your home and caregiving needs to be flexible. Things like larger doorways, accessibility issues, etc. are great to plan at the outset, but more specific things develop as time goes by and the needs become apparent or change.

Even the "no carpeting" idea you listed has flaws... Sometimes carpeting provides the BEST walking surface. All bare floors, ESPECIALLY the new laminate ones, are MUCH more slippery and allow furniture and people to move on their surfaces, whereas most wall-to-call carpeting does not. Carpeting also provides a little cushion that can make the difference between bad bruises and open wounds and broken bones. It DEPENDS on the scenario...

In my mom's case, her room has laminate floors. BUT she is BEDRIDDEN! When she was ambulatory, we had carpeting and it saved her many, many times! When she got laid up, I changed the flooring to accommodate her needs and those of her support equipment and personnel (that would be me).

Guidelines, suggestions and tips are solely for brainstorming purposes. Each person must evaluate their own needs and situation. Even pros don't think of everything, especially if they do not know the patient, family and home where the patient will reside.

You have to also think about AFTER the caring... installing and building things that only pertain to caregiving may be useless and in the way later on... Trying to make things multi-purpose is the happy medium.

If I were building a new home, I might think about separating the heating/cooling system for an elder's room from the rest of the house, not only for comfort, but for infection control and odor control. I would also locate it very conveniently, yet "apart" from the normal noise and hubbub of a multi-generational home. Gramma doesn't wanna listen to rap and kids don't wanna listen to Lawrence Welk (and I don't wanna hear EITHER ONE!)! A little cabinet & countertop that would accommodate a small refrigerator and microwave and sink would be WONDERFUL! While Mom is ambulatory and independent, she can have her own cereal, coffee, etc. right there. Later on, using it to store meds, juices for her use and to warm bathing cloths, etc. is a godsend.

Yes, when dealing with bedridden people, rolling EVERYTHING is the hot-setup. Study hospital rooms and equipment and you will see that having things easy to roll right to the patient's bedside, or shove away in one good push, are the order of the day there.

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While I feel sure y'all's enthusiasm is appreciated, I'm confident that the owners of this site have explored many ways to fund it - in fact, there is a store here from which MANY materials may be purchased. They probably don't need another project... They have been directly involved with this "industry" for a loooong time and have a much better understanding than I do of what their costs, time and needs are than any of us "amateurs" do. Let's focus on what we need to do to help and support one another and let the pros and budding authors take care of that end of the deal themselves.

Xina, I can see "Elder Care for Dummys" being on the best sellers list in no time. BG has a good suggestion. Maybe a large donation to the maintenance of this site would be forth coming, not that I remember ever seeing any request for funding. Still, ????

Good list. Since Nonna , still is competent, what she and the lawyer come up with for will and wishes should not be disputable. A lawyer in these cases, to write things right, is invaluable.

Very much looking forward to your input as things progress. Your journey will be a great help here.

Xinam, brilliant! I love this. This will help many people getting into this situation so I think we should dedicate this thread to this topic of getting ready for our LO's.

Moms buddy had a nifty little trick that I adapted into our situation here and that is a Rolling cart with everything you need for cleaning up, ointments used, depends, washcloths, and baby wipes etc etc.

Another thing which is very important when dealing with our LO's is safety and heres the thread
http://eldercare.infopop.cc/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/32560301...961097383#2961097383

next!