Hi. First time post. Mom lives in Summerfield, FL. She has a mild case of dementia. She doesn’t qualify to be in “assisted living”, but she doesn’t want to live on her own either. We are looking to have someone move in for free room and board. They wouldn’t need to take care of her. We would still have someone come by twice a week to take her shopping, take care of medication, etc. We just wants someone who is good with the elderly there so that she isn’t alone. I was thinking about craigslist or posting something at nearby universities. Do you know of any agencies that do roommate matching with the elderly or anything like that? Thank you so much for any help you might be able to give. Have a good day.

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Originally posted by givecare:
Hi, I work as a private live-in companion/caregiver. I have been doing this for the last 5 years. Two of the people who hired me advertised on Craigslist.

Please do not bash people looking for work on Craigslist or disqualify them, just because you hear some awful stories on the news. Most of the people are just looking for help or like myself, may be looking for a job. I assure you I am a very ethical person with a totally non-criminal background.

By all means, require references and do a background check. Maybe you should exchange references with potential live-in.

Thank you for listening.

Welcome, givecare. I hope you will not take offense, but I would NEVER recommend someone use Craigslist or Angieslist or any type of non-professional internet listing for something as important as a live-in caregiver for an elderly person with dementia.

"MAYBE" you should exchange references? "MAYBE"? PuhLEEZE!!! The reason that people go through agencies is to protect BOTH the elderly person AND the caregiver!

Sorry! No offense to you personally, but I do NOT agree with you in any way, shape nor fashion. There are just too many other more legitimate avenues to advertise one's services! Perhaps you have been fortunate, but I won't recommend that people roll the dice like that when looking for a caregiver for a loved one!!!

Don't feel bad, though - I wouldn't look for a brain surgeon on Craigslist either.

Hi, I work as a private live-in companion/caregiver. I have been doing this for the last 5 years. Two of the people who hired me advertised on Craigslist.

Please do not bash people looking for work on Craigslist or disqualify them, just because you hear some awful stories on the news. Most of the people are just looking for help or like myself, may be looking for a job. I assure you I am a very ethical person with a totally non-criminal background.

By all means, require references and do a background check. Maybe you should exchange references with potential live-in.

Thank you for listening.

You might check into "independent living" retirement communities. These vary in services, but most of them are set up with the presumption that the retiree either has or might develop some issues which require support.

Many of these are a private apartment with kitchen and a lock on the door, but set up more like a hotel in that the doorway to the apartment is in a hallway and there is housekeeping and a dining room. There is a receptionist on duty around the clock in the lobby. There are pull cords by the bed and in the bathroom. They pay attention to who hasn't come down to breakfast or lunch and will check on them. But otherwise, the residents live independently, many of them still have their cars. Most of them have social opportunities such as bridge groups, trips together on the van to the theater, restaurants, shopping at the mall, etc.

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She has a mild case of dementia. She doesn’t qualify to be in “assisted living”, but she doesn’t want to live on her own either

Welcome, RJK. I am a little confusd... If your mom has dementia symptoms (dementia isn't a disease - it's a collection of symptoms caused by other diseases and conditions) she should qualify for assisted living. Different assisted living places have different qualifications and criteria. Why did she NOT qualify? If she is exhibiting dementia symptoms, what is causing them? Has she seen a neurologist or what? Did you speak with her doctor or are you getting your information from your mom? Do you live near your mom? If not, you may need to take a trip thre to speak with people, interview candidates for assistance, etc. Trust me when I say that this isn't something that can be handled over the phone! The elderly are FREQUENTLY victimized by caregivers, especially live-ins when family is not nearby... Please don't use craigslist for this! You are talking about someone who would be living with your mother, not selling a washing machine!!! A university is not a good choice either because the people there are generally in school as students and are young folks. Handling people with dementia takes a lot of compassion, maturity and knowledge. Most younger folks simply haven't spent enough time on the planet to handle such a responsibility!

Fill us in on some of the missing details and perhaps we could be more specific in our suggestions to you.

Hello rjk16, glad to meet you. Companions can work and have, but what worked 20 years ago is getting riskier and I have concerns. Students are seasonal, sometimes transfer mid semester, like to go places, have visitors. It could get tricky. Craigslist?? not without full background checks including credit report.

This person will have opportunity to influence your mother and great gut instincts on your part will be called for.

You don't mention your mother's age or the cause of her dementia, but I am wondering about why she doesn't qualify for assisted living or a senior residential community setting. There are progressive care communities that can be worth looking at. Is your mother resisting the idea of moving. Some assisted living places have actual apartments for more capable residents where they bring their own furniture, decorate to suit themselves.

Often when seniors will make this move early (depending on affordability)they actually adjust much better, make friends join in activities than they do when they are less physically able and more mentally confused. I really don't know what your options may be and to find her a companion might be the best answer. Is religion or ethnic background going to be an issue for her. Keep in mind that we really can't always expect our elders to be politically correct about who is in their home. Good luck. I hope you will keep us informed as this is a very interesting topic.