Anybody with experience with male incontinence products? Penile clamps? Incontinence drugs? At night we need something better than diapers with incontinence pads, which have to be changed constantly. Any experience with Kegel or other bladder training exercises? Help?!?

Here’s the latest. We got a new caregiver, and the process was not as painless as it should have been, but that’s another story. Today we move on to a new disaster.

After the other caregiver left, I was there for 3 days/nights as a “fill in” until our big family meeting. We didn’t want to start with a new caregiver until after the meeting, where we would discuss how my dad is doing, and the new skills needed. The new caregiver started yesterday and stayed one night so far.

The new caregiver is very good with motivation, working with my dad on ADLs and exercise, and was able to drive him to his doctor’s appointment today. (Yes, we put him on the insurance.) But last night, the need to tend my dad for incontinence proved too much, and he said he really should have people in 2 shifts. Problem is, this is more than twice as expensive! He has agreed to stay the weekend, but after that, it’s going to be 2 people until…

My dad’s catheter was in for 6 months. After the prostate surgery about 5 weeks ago, he used the urinal at night a bit, and I had hoped it would improve. The last caregiver did not alert us to how bad it was, but when I was there these last 3 nights, and had to get up every 3 hours to change his incontinence pads and/or diaper and/or bed pad, I found out what was going on. (I should have been up every 2 hours in truth.)

During the day, we can change the diapers and incontinence pads. At night, to keep him from floating away in the bed, apparently we need a second caregiver. I would note that my dad won’t be getting uninterrupted sleep either with someone changing pads every 2 hours..

One reluctant choice may be to bring him here, and maybe getting a night only caregiver – I can handle all day activities and exercise, ADLs, etc. Problem is, we have a tiny house and the only place we could put a caregiver would be in the living room.

On a positive note, my father continues to make progress in therapy, and whenever the OT has him try something new, he surprises her.

He is “almost” ready to be left on his own according to the PT, but he still needs help doing many things. There is a minor worry about falling, but reduced hours may be a possibility. He is not the least bit demented or confused right now, so he can be told not to do something crazy. But if he goes on incontinence drugs, who knows…

I also worry about this company seeing $$ and wanting to help so much. Well, truth be known, there aren’t that many dollars as they might hope!

Thank you for any suggestions you can give me.

Things seem to be improving with his new caregiver, who is a man. He has my dad squeeze and push when on the toilet (Kegel exercises?), and encourages him to use the urinal at night. So far, better. At least we don't have to split it into two shifts, and pay hourly. He couldn't afford that!

As for the UTI we'll find out at his urology follow-up next week, but with the cateter out it's less likely than it used to be. People tell me that having a catheter in for 6 months, followed by prostate surgery, is a recipe for incontinence.

Not sure the external catheter would work on him... may be worth a try, though.

I am worried about him taking the incontinence drugs because of possible side effects. My dad thinks we should wait a month and keep trying as it is now, and see if it improves more. I think that's a good idea.

Somewhere, I think it's in the daily challenges section, is a thread I started on external catheters. They fit on like a condom but there is a 'nozzle' that you attach to a tube that drains into a bag. These things have been a life-saver for me!! At least, when I'd got the hang of getting the things on...

Frequent peeing in older men could be due to enlargement of the prostrate - try saw palmetto tablets to reduce it a bit.

Found the link! Hope it's not too graphic... learning to use a sheath catheter

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Olivia,

I suspected as much....
Hun I got one question here and that is...exactly how much is he urinating that you need to change a pad every 2 hours?!
If this is one time urination then you dont need to change it right away and excuse me? just how large is your dad that he would need 2 cgs to move him?
I mean not for nothin Iv moved a dude 6'3" 260lbs around in a bed with little effort comeon whats this guys prob?
Im 5'3 so Im on the smallish side
All it takes to scoot a person of average to large size is having a draw sheet in place and the bed itself partially away from the wall so you can get behind the head and pull the draw sheet up there by repositioning your dad with ease.
In company terms anyone who awakens more than 2 times a night qualifies for 8 hour shifts verses 12 hour shifts where a cg can also sleep during that period.
Now onto the matter of frequent urination has he been checked for a UTI?
Or is this a matter of him taking a med or drinking alot of fluids or coffee or tea?
If this isnt UTI and its consuming large amounts of fluids then I would get him to stop drinking fluids 2-3 hours before bedtime or at the very least lessen the amounts.
Try to get this in order with his sleep habits and if he shows progress approach the company about overnight shifts rather than 8 hour shifts it will save you a little money.