Why now!!! Why did he leave me now??? We were almost there - together. We were going to beat them together. I have no doubt the court battle will be won by us good guys but then what? Very soon it will be just me and the wee wieners to carry on the unfinished business. I don't want my grief to drive my anger. I feel the need to pick myself up and help someone else. I would like to go fishing.

Thanks Bobcat, Thanks for your understanding. My lawyer guy did tell me to keep a low profile about most of it. Think he would mind if I smile every now and then? It is HOT today. I'm melting. Opps....supper is ready. Later Gaters

We missed you ,too, Sprig, But I was sure you'ld be back. Thanks for the update. Hope this process comes to a result for you before too long, but I guess it takes a while to find and put in order all the paper work you can.
Maybe the land lord understands now that you seriously DO NOT appreciate his attentions.

The lawyers among us always advise caution about what is put on a public forum while cases are pending, so I understand if you can't discuss details and must be vague. Good luck , Darlin'. So glad you have IH on your side. Give him a hug from me.

Hi Everyone, I'll bet you thought you were rid of me. WRONG ANSWER. The kid is back.

I haven't had a real chance to do all my catch up reading but I will. I's amazing how long this past week has been. My brain is in shut down mode concerning Ralph's funeral. A few of Ralph's friends came but not many and his family was a no show. I'm just as glad. Now I feel sorry for them. For what they missed while Ralph was alive and for what my new, hot shot, big time, with a whole law firm lawyer is going to do to them. They are TOAST! And lets not forget my (for the time being) landlord. You would not believe some of the crap he pulled all last week while I was buring my husband. Well, he got smacked between the eyes this morning with a full PROTECTION FROM HARASMENT order, which also covers Stalking, signed by a Judge. (lady Judge ) The local police were at his door at 10am to serve him the papers. Think that might be why his wife didn't go to work today? My lawyer guy is now handeling my two HUGE lawsuits. One aimed at my landlord and the monster 5-star one aimed at my in-laws. IH called him Monday morning and 2 hours later I was in his office. (bless biker buddies) Folks, this guy has 12 inch fangs! I LOVE IT!!!He told me my job now is to get him all the paperwork I can find and he will get the rest. After that, I'm to sit down with a pen and paper and figure out how I want to spend all the money he is going to get for me. Minus his cut of course. Well, think I will go wring my hair out - it is a hot one tonight. Missed you all............

Sprig, How are you doing ? Pretty wrung out I quess.

Sprig, I'll be out of touch until Sat evening. I just want you to know I'll be thinking about you all the time, honey. Take care.

Sprig. At my mom's wake I was very nice to bro and his wife and daughter. I made sure Dan also went up and said hello to them and my sil's family was also greated. Several friends came and told me that my bro was saying how he took care of my mom in the end. Everyone there knew he was "taking care" of mom for the last 2 hours of her life only. I just let him talk and say what he wanted. Everyone there KNEW who took care of her and at my request didn't say anything back to him. My friends and co-workers were there to run interference if he got nasty but him seeing my support it never happened. I wish the same for you. This is a time to honor Ralph's life. Let us know how you make out. I wish I could be one of those supporters physically there with you. Then I'd get right on that fishing boat with you. I love fishing too!

Sprig, that's exactly right. Be a sweetheart to the "family" if they show up in front of the friends. The close friends and family know all about it anyway, and they'll be more than glad to run interference if anything starts to turn nasty.
If I liked fishing, and hadn't been able to do it because of caring for my husband, that's one of the first things I would do, because I know how peaceful and calm that is; it will clear your mind and will enable you to focus on future happenings. (However, I have no problem accompanying "fisher folk", because then I can sit there with a good book!)
You will be able to get through Saturday - you've already been through enough fire and come out stronger for it.
Many hugs.

BC, It's been a long time since I heard that song and I have to thank you for it. Sprigof I am really so sorry you have to go through this with your family. I am glad you do have a good support team. I don't think of my brother too much anymore and just get down to business of the house. It's his problem that he doesn't want any contact with me the way I see it. Sure it hurts at times but it was his choice and as hard as it is I am moving on. It's been 2 months now and everyday is a little bit easier. I do understand and you are tright. I too have this group as a support and without it I could never have been this strong.

Hi fd&h, By the grace of my higher power, I do have a support team. IH and you very fine ladies. Helping others is what I want to continue to do. It would be like taking a bee away from it's honey to do otherwise. I can't help myself. It's what I was born to do. I know this. And when Ralph's money is returned to his estate, I will use it in some way to help others. Sounds simplistic but I mean it. Thank you.

Bobcat, That song just blew me away. I'm speechless but I can type. Thank you!!!!!
MB, You are so very right. The funeral is this Saturday. Ralph did not want a big funeral with tons of people so it will be family and a few close friends. His family may attend if they wish. I will be a sweetheart just to piss them off! Thank you

quote:

I still have a chance to give Ralph his full life back. Maybe then I can go through with the burial. There, I said it.

Nope, actually you don't have that chance, sprig. He is free now. Ralph is dead whether he left with legalities unsettled or not. Because he is dead, he needs to be buried. First things first. Bury the man, then carry on with whatever you must in the courtroom. We set aside anger and dispute for burials. Check the guns and knives at the door, then pick up the fight AFTER the service.

This pic and this song comfort me when I think aboout my niece and my Bro. I hope it wil comfort you.

Oh people, look around you
The signs are everywhere.
You've left it for somebody other than you
To be the one to care.
You're lost inside your houses,
Theres no time to find you now.
Your walls are burning and your towers are turning,
Im going to leave you here and try to get down to the sea somehow.

The road is filled with homeless souls,
Every woman, child and man,
Who have no idea where they will go,
But they'll help you if they can.
Now everyone must have some thought
That's going to pull them through somehow.
Well the fires are raging hotter and hotter
But the sisters of the sun are going to rock me on the water now.

Rock me on the water.
Sister will you soothe my fevered brow?
Rock me on the water.
I'll get down to the sea somehow.

Oh people, look among you.
Its there your hope must lie.
There's a sea bird above you
Gliding in one place like Jesus in the sky.
We all must do the best we can,
And then hang on to that gospel plow.
When my life is over, I'm going to stand before the father,
But the sisters of the sun are going to rock me on the water now

Rock me on the water,
Sister will you soothe my fevered brow
Rock me on the water, maybe I'll remember,
Maybe I'll remember how.
Rock me on the water,
The wind is with me now.
So rock me on the water,
I'll get down to the sea somehow.
by Jackson Browne

My bro died after a long round with depression and alcholism of what they termed multiple system failure. 3 years ago.
We used to play and sing together often. He gave me my first guitar. He was 58
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZosAh0Xv358

Baby, I'm no one's hero, I am so in awe of everything you have gone through, and are facing, that no matter what you decide is right for you to do, you are in my book of ALL STARS.
And them weiner puppys need you. Hang tough .

sprig. i'm sorry you are hurting so much. remember, ralph did not leave you by choice. i'm sorry he was not able to stay around to see the dealings with the family through to the end. you need to grieve and be ready to go on to fight the fight for him. beat those jerks for ralph! are you in an area to check out grief councelors or community mental health assistance. it might help if you don't have someone there to support you. no one can do it alone! you have been through a lot and are still here so i know you have a core of strength you are probably not aware of. i can feel your anger. it is justified to feel so angry but keep control of it. don't let the hate and anger consume you. remember all the good times you had with your husband and the love you shared. the idea of getting through this and helping others is a good, strong thought. can you think of ways you could use your experiences to help others? think of it. you might surprise yourself. take care.

Hi Bobcat, You are becoming my hero here. I do know Ralph would want me to walk into that court room and walk out with all we were fighting for. And if I hear June 25th is still on, I think I might do just that. If I don't, our fight would have been for nothing and I don't want that. I don't want to let him down. I'm just so damn mad at a good chunk of the world right now. But I don't want to lose sight of what we were fighting for. I will hang on. I will never let them win our fight. I still have a chance to give Ralph his full life back. Maybe then I can go through with the burial. There, I said it.

Fishing is really good, really, really good.

Sprig, what can I say?. Baby, I know Ralph would want this for you, to be paid in full, but whether you can go through with it now, or send your lawyer in alone, The judge saw you and Ralph. May be you don't have to be there this time. Please hang on.