Last night, I had the most beautiful and amazing dream ... about my mother. Of course, that strikes me as "only natural" - all things considered. (I've been going through so many boxes of things from my parent's house.) There have been vintage pictures, love letters, cards, etc. Just SO much "stuff."

But, THIS dream was different than any I've had before since Mother passed away! It's a little fuzzy right now; I wish I'd come in and typed it out at 1:30 this morning. She and I were in a house; sometimes theirs; sometimes this one. But "a" house, nonetheless. There was an underlying current/feeling with me that "knew" she had already passed, but I didn't truly believe it yet.

As she was "laying" somewhere during her last couple of years, (couch) (bed), it made complete sense to me that she and I were laying on her bed, talking. She was gently "trying to tell me; convince me" that she had passed on. I was still in denial.

At one point, she got up and changed into her nightgown and hung her "white with black spackled print" skirt and blouse in the closet. Then she went out to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I jumped straight up, ran to the closet, and searched for those clothes she was wearing, to feel the "warmth" that would still be in them ... if she was, indeed, still alive. I could feel no warmth.

She laid back down on the bed beside me and I looked over at her, to "sneak" a peek, somehow afraid that she might look glaringly horrid and ugly. I don't know why, but I was scared. Then, I took a full and long gazing look. She looked EXACTLY as I remembered her and I felt so happy. I began telling her how much I loved her, and she said she loved me, too. (Tears come to my eyes right now as I type this.)

She encouraged me to "keep looking" at her face, as she began to tell me what a wonderful daughter I had been and that she and Daddy had always loved me so much, as I was their only child "together." I kept gazing lovingly at her face.

She told me that she would lay there with me, as long as I needed her to, until I "believed" and then she would just purely and very simply fade away. I looked at her for a long time, all the time whispering "I love you's."

And, finally she was gone. And I woke up.

Bill was in his office and I stopped at the door and said, "I just had the most beautiful dream about Mother." He asked if I wanted to tell him about it (good Bill!!!), but I was too emotional. I went back to bed and when I laid down, the tears ran down my cheeks and into my ears!! I said, "Thank You, Lord" and I went back to sleep.

It was a true blessing. And I wanted to share it with you. I've just never had a dream like that one before.

I love these "dreams" Janie...they are truly beautiful visits from our LO's who seem to know exactly when we miss them the most and need that extra lil something from them.
It felt different because it was, she visited you. Did you have a fear that you were going to forget the gentle nuances of her face? That you needed to hear the I love you's just one more time?? That was her. I feel my own mom around me on most days giving me little nudges in the right direction when I question myself. She knows I still need her around just as yours does....

Well, "meme", that is very special. Thank you for posting it. It's really a "different" type of spin on things, isn't it.

AND GOD SAID...
===============

I said, "God, I hurt."
And God said, "I know."

I said, "God, I cry a lot."
And God said, "That's why I gave you tears."

I said, "God, I am so depressed."
And God said, "That's why I gave you sunshine."

I said, "God, life is so hard."
And God said, "That's why I gave you loved ones."

I said, "God, my loved one died."
And God said, "So did mine."

I said, "God, It is such a loss."
And God said, "I saw mine nailed to a cross."

I said, "God, where are they now?"
And God said, "Mine is on my right and yours is in the light."

I said, "God it hurts."
And God said, "I know."

~ by K.C. and Myke Kuzmic~
Posted on the wall at the Oklahoma City bombing site.

Dear Steve, hold that dream close to your heart. I am so happy to hear that you saw your parents again, whole and healthy and thankful!

I confess, I have been wondering what the family has been "up to", but didn't want to bring it up. I think you have been given a tremendously beautiful ~ GIFT ~ .... hold on to it.

Here is my recent dream.

Right now I am undergoing huge stresses from my family. As a devout Christian, I had a dream where I was sitting in Paradise surrounded by very tame tigers, lions and other beasts. A water fall was nearby as was a stream filled with millions of fish and every type of sea creature you can imagine.

The Lord appeared before me and said, "Steve, your heart is telling me your troubles. Do not hold onto bitter thoughts as they will not amount to anything. These bitter thoughts will only poison your soul and prevent you from loving and receiving love. Your soul cannot be forgiven unless it is free from bitterness and anger. Come, follow me, I have a few people you should be aware of that want to see you".

Upon following the Lord, I was lead to another equally beautiful section of Paradise. There in front of me stood my mother and father. My father said, "Steve, thank you so much for loving and caring for me while I was alive. Although I never told you, I really appreciated your love and sacrifice". My mother then said, "Steve, you are truly a loving son. Your heart is pure and remember those with a pure heart will enter the Jesus Christ's new Kingdom!

My mother and father appeared to me in much younger bodies with NO physical disabilities whatsoever.

You all are giving me the chills. But its good to hear i'm not the only one that has these experiences with dreams, "feelings of someone touching me" or the smells. Glad you all posted your experiences so that I feel valid with my experiences. Wow, makes you wonder about spirits and ghosts and all the things some people claim don't exist. I just wish I could contact them when i want to and not when they choose to!!!!!!

Janie,
It is amazing how much these dreams can give us peace. My birth mother died when I was 8, and my dad passed in 99 and my wonderful step-mom in 2003. I had never dreamed about Mom or Dad until after my step-mom died and then it was several months later when I was under a lot of stress. All 3 of them came and sat on my bed and told me how proud of me they were and that I was doing everything right where it came to the estate. That gave me a lot of peace. My mother also let me know that she understood why I loved my step mom so much too. I haven't "seen" her before or since. Then about a month ago, I dreamt about my step-mom and dad. They looked the way they used to when they were young and healthy. It was so great. My dad even commented on the color of the house. He just said it was definitely my house now because it is a color he wouldn't have chosen, but it definitely fits me. I woke myself up laughing at that. After they visit I always feel so much better, especially knowing they are happy. They also seem to know when I need them most.

The healing that a visit from one of our loved ones can produce is nothing short of magical. My dad died when I was 13. For years, I would have dreams. The dreams were similar. He would be there, I would say, "But I thought you were dead" and there would be some cover sotry for why he was NOT dead (secret mission for the Navy, etc.). I accepted the cover story then we talked about whatever the subject for his visitation seemed to be.

As I aged, the visits came more seldomly. The last time I had a visit was 18 years ago, after one of my dogs had suddenly passed away and I was grieving terribly - brokenhearted as I awaited post-mortem exam results to see why my "healthy", arctic breed dog had died of pneumonia in June!!

In the dream, the usual happened - "I thought you were dead," but this time he replied, "I don't have much time" so I knew he was not gonna try to do a cover story. He asked to see my recently deceased dog, so I called her and put her through her paces for him to see (she was a highly trained dog with a buncha titles). He had engendered my love of animals and dog training and I was so proud to show him what I had learned from the seeds he had planted in my heart. We finished and she ran to him, licking his face. He buried his hands in her fur, laughing, and smiled up at me and told me he was proud of me. They disappeared together and I awoke, bawling but at peace.

Despite his leaving so early in my life, he was always around when I needed him most.

Thanks, Daddy!

Oh Janie,
Thanks for sharing that. I want that dream too! This time last year I would go get into Mom's bed with her and hold her hand and we would visit and nap together.

I too haven't had the space until now to grieve. Men were here, my house was torn up, the holidays were coming. Her room is just as she left it, her things still in the drawers. I need a week alone with my Kleenexes before I can even open her photo albums.

Somehow I feel embarrassed and slightly crazy to be so weepy in front of my husband. How can I have a good cry when the phone is ringing and I have to answer the door?

My baby sister put her beautiful carved bone heron necklace into Mother's cold hands at the funeral home and sent it with her. Mother was a bird lover. The next week we were camping at Lake Powell, she and I, and were startled at a huge heron circled right over us three times at dusk and landed in a tree next to us. We felt very "visited".

Yes, Moms_Buddy and May ....... it was special, but it was so much more. And, that's why I posted the dream here.

Someone said to me: "You were - to say the least - occupied with your father's situation after your mother died, which probably explains
the delay."


And, I replied: "Very, very, very true!! I didn't "have time" to grieve Mother because Daddy required so much attention after her death. During the four months before his stroke, I was driving the 6-hr round trip to his house every weekend, or at least every 10 days or so. He was devestated by her death and I tried to "help him" through it as much as I could (putting my feelings on the back burner and, most likely, keeping me in denial.)

Then, when he DID have the stroke, I was in his town for six weeks, staying at their house and visiting him every day. Making decisions in his behalf; petitioning the Court for his guardianship; signing papers for a pacemaker operation; going to PT with him every day; wondering why my brother did not come to visit; shaving him and just generally encompassing my whole existence with his care.

I had him moved here and the whole process continued here, until his death "three weeks short" of a year later. It wasn't until THEN that I truly realized I had lost them both.

My dreams of them, in the beginning, were surreal. Crazy and illogical dreams that made no sense. And, I'd awaken all confused and conflicted and tearful. And, I've never had a dream "like that" about Daddy. Probably because I *HAD* him for that last year and was able to give to him; spend wonderful time with him; "take care" of him; tell him how much I loved him.

I didn't have that year with Mother. And, there was, like, a hole in my heart that somehow subconsciously believed she wasn't "really" gone. And, analyzing myself here, I DO believe that is what the dream about her gave me. THAT is why I was happy and thankful. In "that" dream, I told her how much I loved her and .... she "took care of me", in that she said she'd stay as long as I needed her. I was, finally, able to say goodbye. It was a precious and sweet dream; a wonderfully beautiful and healing gift from God.

So, Moms_Buddy .... it was a visit, but it was so much more!!

Edna May, I do feel that you had a visit from your Mother. Too many "coincidences" for it to not have happened.

Even though it has been years, I have continued to be unable to deal with Mother's death. And, now I know why. I never "let her go."

Daddy's death was horrid, but somehow - after all these years - I have come out on the other side of it.

The dream about Mother freed me so much. It was a true blessing. And I will forever thank God that He sent her to me.

Janie, I have never had a dream about mother.I did have 2 instances, late in the night, after taking a shower, I came out of the bathroom and got a scent that was not one of the house.It really was strong and it threw me for a loop.I went all over the house smelling candles.I do not use scented lotions, etc.Then I recalled that was the fragrance my daughter took to my mother in the care facility.It happened 2 times and 2 times to my daughter.One other time, I was resting on the living couch with my face to the wall.I was getting ready to dose off when I felt these taps on my shoulders.I turned around to see and no one was there.My husband and my self were the only ones in the house.The tap is how mother would awaken me if I was sleeping.

Sounds like Mom came to visit.
It's very comforting, isn't it?

Janie , What a beautiful dream.