There has been nothing from the administrator of this site to us Moderators. We cannot offer you any explaination for the week off line. For many, you may not even have noticed, but for folks who check in everyday, this was a cruel experience.

Thank you all for staying in touch, there are some truely wonderful members here who will help you in any way that they can.

With no feed back, I can only wonder when it may happen again, and maybe for ever.

In light of this possibility, I recommend you all have back up plans to stay in touch with members of special importance to you. I also recommend that you do not use this or any other forum to store your journals, albums, or important links.

Certainly this highlights the strengths and weaknesses of a forum family. I urge you all to use caution in the public forum, the chat rooms, PMs, and in any personal contacts you choose to maintain.... love to you all. Big Hugs. It is NOT the site, it is the people.

Do you even know how many elder care forums there are? I love this one. but if it folds, (and all this bruhaha was a real wakeup call to me,), I will not take the chance of leaving my special friends behind.

Here are links to places we might meet if there is another crash here.

http://www.aging-parents-and-elder-care.com/
this one seems very friendly but not in a familiar format, you just dive in.

http://users.boardnation.com/~caregivers/index.php
this one seems very new a lot of blank spots.

http://www.adcaregiver.com/index.php
I am a little shy for myself here because either I am in denial, or Mom does not have dementia. She caught the punch line in the last joke I told her, no explaination needed.
But If this site crashes, I will look for members every where.

I do hope we won't have any more trouble for a long long time.

If any of you have additional sites you think may be appropriate for us to meet, well, normally, I would protest advertising other sites, but right now, I say go for it.

Shoot, the Administrator, is not around enough to object.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Bobcat,

It has been along day.We have been given a tough pill to swallow by MB.I do hope everyone has a chance to reflect and see tomorrow as a better day in many areas.

Emberson, I wish I had thought to store my journals.I was just so thrilled that the day the forum reopened they took the time to copy mine for me.
My jounals are not more important then those who have been such an important part of this forum.But they tell me a story and allow me to reflect.Let me remember that we are faced with so many unknowns.We are challenged each day not knowing if we can meet that challenge.It is also a reflection of us when we began this journey and how far we have come.It is for many a testiment to just how strong they became and how they gained self condfidence.It shows how much we mature as people when faced with so much.

I'm not so much worried about losing my posts here as I have another journal where I chronicle Mom's decline in detail, but I am concerned with the thought of losing contact with everyone.

Mae, your journal and Billy's were a big part of my grief when I could not find this site again. Odd maybe, you are caring for a spouse, not a parent now when I meet you. Your words are so prescious to me. Any day.

When I thought that your posts might be lost, I floundered. Please all. Take care to share but not lose you thoughts.

I do know that there have been times when Rich shut down to buy more bandwidth.Takes alot plus money.Maybe he was sending a message .APPRECIATE WHAT YOU HAVE HERE , RESPECT ONE ANOTHER OR YOU WILL NOT HAVE THE FORUM.BUT THAT DOES NOT ANSWER WHY HE LEFT THE MODERATORS IN THE DARK

BunnysGrl, I was so fortunate that someone was so thoughtful they copied all of my daily challenges posts.Sixty three pages.I was so trilled.I plan to burn them on a cd.If I were to try to print them my printer would probably begin to smoke.I wanted them to be able to look back and reflect.Not only my style of caregiving but view how I accepted the challenges in the beginning and now.

EM, I can't tell you how relieved I was that we were able to receive your post, when we did. I am very sorry we are all being bothered with this now. All we mean to each other is so much more. Sis, that includes you. There are others, who needed help who made contact here, who may have been left hanging, and NO REASON why has been offered.

So I advise you all now, share your journey, but do not store your journal... have another meeting place agreed upon with your favorite contacts... make hard copies, or transfer to files important links and threads.

What Happened here??? There are no new features, no updates, no deletions. What maintanance?? If we were invaded by viruses, trolls, hackers, why aren't we being advised to run all security measures for ourselves?? I don't know what happened here, so to be on the safe side, I am running every security program I've got each time I leave this site.

Still a forum can be a fickle thing. Here today, gone tomorrow. We have tried to boot spammers, guide newbies, be here to advise when we can spare time from our own CG duties, we ask Rich for help, because certain powers he reserves for himself (understandably), but he doesn't show up. This is HIS SITE. We shouldn't have to wait for weeks for a response when we are dealing with poisonous serial posters.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Bobcat,

Ganged up on I didnt make that statement this forum is here for Care giving advice and shoulders to lean on when times get tough I have PERSONALLY gone into the chat room to "Feel" things out there now you havent been in there but I take offense to some of the things I have seen like a new member getting snubbed while a gossip session was going on that had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with Caregiving someone once stated to me they had "squatters rights" in the chat room... Well! I have never dealt with nor would I want to deal with ANYONE who is so egotistical to say something as rude as that to me and treat new members the way I witnessed.
Oh yes and let me burn another bridge here. Some of you dont know the harassing that goes on in that chat room MODERATORS DO.
For the last 3 months all moderators have been apprised of the behind the scenes troubles with this chat room one including an alleged crime committed with an old member here who then posed as another member yet again this last month meanwhile 2 of them where mixing it up with Seasoned members and involving them in their drama as even I have these emails and PM's from the complainants about the trouble.
If you want me to say the chat room is a blessing Im sorry you will NEVER hear that coming from my lips.
Again you ONLY know half the story I/WE know the WHOLE story and this aint about taking sides this is with PROOF... WRITTEN PROOF.
I am madder than a hornet about all this trouble and this close to letting Grace leave me for a moment so I am asking for the sake of this forum to STOP
If y'all wanna talk about Caregiving then DO SO IN THE FORUM Stop snubbing members or you are gonna find yourself on the losing end no one likes a click.
If you want to gossip do so in email OFF FORUM GROUNDS.

quote:

Originally posted by mae:
Emberson, you said is right.Thank you.

I'm finally making sense?!?!?

Thanks Mae!

Emberson, you said is right.Thank you.

I had no idea the outage was as long as it was. There was one day I found it down, panicked for a minute, then figured it was down for maintenance. I never realized what a thread this site hung upon .

MB, if you're still lurking -- I think I speak for everyone else in that you will solely be missed. I've gained so much information and insight from you, BG, Bobcat, and everyone else here that I cannot imagine how my journey would've been without all of you. True, I'm not around here as much as I'd like to be, but trust me, I've got all of you in the back of my mind

I'd hate to see this place shut down. Out of all the sites I explored, this one is hands down the most comprehensive when it comes to elder care. As others have said, we ARE a family in a way. I don't know about anyone else, but when a family has a rift or falls apart, the reverberations can be endless. I hate stuff like that, and I don't want it happening here.

Bobcat, your compassion for all here is most visable as are those who come here when possible to become a part of a family who needs help and wants to give help.
Rich really threw a curve ball at those he chose to be the moderators for his forum.It hurt them.They gave it their very best and it must have felt like a slap in the face.Not a very professional way to deal with those your entrusted to carry the ball.
He use to post messages now and then.If you look he has not done any for quite some time.
If maintaining the forum has become too much for him he would be wise to inform the members.
This forum has been a stepping stone for so many for quite a while.
I recall the chat room use to be a weekly gathering place for so many members.At the time I has web tv and was unable to participate.Then I got my computer, went to chat and discovered I was the slowest and worst typist.That is also the reason I seldom use IM.
This is a very stressful time for many.Many are dealing with a full plate.Many are just so tired that we tend to see things different then they were intended.
But that does not take away the importance this forum and the people are.
What Rich has planned for the forum, I have no idea.I have been apart of the forum and the way it works that I find others to be foreign to me.That does not mean they are less.Just old habits are hard to break.
Just remember how lost each of us were when the forum was not available to us.It was though we had lost a family member.It has become such a strong part of our lives.
Maybe the fact that Harry was not open to sell his watered down drinks came to play.
I do hope the other moderators choose to stay.They show such knowledge and are able to find away to resolve issues that crop up between members.
MB will certainly be missed.She always gave 100 %and tried to be impartial.We al know that is not always easy.
Let us not forget the moderators are dealing with everyday problems as well as be moderators.
I hope we can find it in our hearts to get pass the events of the last week and move forward.
We are all dealing with so much, but let us imagine what those who have lost so much in the fires in California.We can begin to count our blessings and they are many

MB, BG, if you ever peek back, You are more than welcome to hijack my thread anytime. I felt I was sticking my neck out a bit with this post, because I did it with no input from others, but what you said is nothing but the truth.

Casey,(Rich), was here shortly before the site went down, and he was back the day it went up again. Said nothing to any of us.
No general message to the forum, nothing in the team room, no e-mails or PMs to the Mods.

If it happened once, it can happen again. Last time for a week, next time, who knows? I like the way this forum is laid out, but I have serious doubts about how it is handled. There are people here who are as dear to me as many I see face to face.

I do not know to this moment if this site was invaded by a virus or hacked, or what. I see nothing new added, no clean up of old stuff, No Explaination!! No apology to those who needed us and were waiting,,,waiting,,

I am sorry if you moderators are thinking i was attacking you. I wasn't... I was just saying I got a response when I emailed.
I think it's unfair that I get ganged up on for stating what I went through trying to find out what was goiing on with the site.
I see harsh judgement by you... I also see slamming of the people who do choose to go to chat rooms to talk about their problems. Maybe if you hung out there more you would see help is being administered to those that need it... yes we have fun in there but we do a lot of help and support of one another... bobcat knows that she has been there.
The purpose of this site is to get help anywhere a person feels most comfortable. That might be posting, or chat room both are of value. Some people want instant advice. If we can't answer it we tell them how to look things up on the forum or post so more people will respond.
I'm sorry it has come to turning on one another. There is no reason for this. Anyone who writes on this forum is doing a good job. We all are in pain and come for help and comfort and not to be judged.
Once again, I did not mean to hurt anyones feelings... I never have... but apparently that happened. I was just stating I heard back what the problem was and yes the site should of posted a problem with software...
Let's all move on and be happy we are here for each other.

Moms Buddy, to have just read you will not be part of the good team of Moderators is like recieving a death notice.You ladies have done such a wonderful job.A job that is most difficult.
You 3 represent the very best in people.
I also sent an email to Rich with no response.Not something I thought he was capable of doing.
I have been here for almost 8 years.All the moderators were top notch.I do know it is not an easy task when you are having to deal with a variety of personalities.
You all know you are family to most on the forum.They know your strengths and gravitate to the 3 of you.You make so many sad by leaving.I know you run a top notch site.I wish you would change your mind.I know I speak for others as well.Your reasons for departure are understood but out reason to be sad are to be understood.
I know they say people come in and out of your life for a reason.

Well to answer the "who maintains it" Billy it was MB, Myself and just recently. Bobcat was added to the moderators list.
We are the ones that kept this site running smoothly trying to solve problems and bring issues to the administration for which we were ignored for the most part.
Dear Christine:
I am sorry if you think we failed to do our job but trust me WE DID. We all emailed Administration and all of mine came back to me I have 3 different email addys to this administration as well as the forum for Infopop, not one thing was mentioned as to why this site as well as 2 others took a dive last week and if this site is down we have no way of contacting members here unless we have their email addys.
Please be aware there is more to running a site than just posting occasionally or chatting, when honest to goodness forum administrators/creators like MB who plays an active role in her forum, answers come swiftly to the membership when a problem occurs.
The chat function is a different entity all together from the forum, the forum is where care giving members get to know each other and communicate on a daily or weekly basis with each other and thats how more than a few of us did eventually meet up within minutes or hours when the site went down.
In a chat room its like living in a bubble you couldnt possibly know what goes on outside (or behind the scenes here) if you arent a regular and seasoned "forum member".
Please take that into consideration the next time you want to accuse someone of NOT doing their job.
That statement made was simply offensive we consider the folks of this forum part of OUR extended family try and remember that I cherish many of these members and would never willingly disrespect them like this. I was raised with manners and an ability to man up and apologize.
Sorry BC I hijacked

Hey Donswife,

I received your mail and I think I repsonded. If not, I appologize. I certaianly wouldn't want you to think I had ignored you. Sometmes I might miss a post but if it is directd to me I won't miss it. and I will respond as long as the system allows.

Hope I am not too late to catch you MB. I am sorry to see you leave, you have provided me with a wealth of information, advice and care. Even if there are some recent problems with this site I am so happy it is up again. I have no history to know how the site was developed who maintains it, etc but, I certtainly have benefited from it and hope it stays here or if not I could be directed to another similar site to start a new family with. I really missed it while it was down.

Billy G.

MB, I hope you're still "lurking", at least for a little while.

You are our friend.
When you laugh, we laugh.
When you cry, we cry.
When you jump off a bridge
WE'RE SURE ENOUGH GONNA MISS YOU!!!!

I'm just a fairly new member to this forum, but I also tried to contact someone at EC (three times!) and got no response. There was even one time when I tried to contact (I think it was Mumbo) and got that same stupid screen. I could and did e-mail Happy and Billy, but it's quite possible that they couldn't access my message for the same reason. It sure was a mess, and I hope it doesn't happen again. As strong as we appear to be, we are all very vulnerable when our lifeboat is sunk from under us. Folks, when you've reached the end of your rope, just tie a knot and hang on! Someone will be there shortly.

Sorry to hijack your thread, BC, but I have a little more to get off my chest.

With regret, but firm commitment, I resign from ECO, effective IMMEDIATELY.
I LOVE the people here and have spent many, many hours trying to help with problems, organize the site to make it better, intercede in disputes and try to help others find common ground. And I would do it all again in a second and more, so trust me when I say to my fellow members, it ain't y'all!

I refuse to be a member of a COMMERICAL PUBLIC site which is NOT administered. The way that members and ESPECIALLY moderators were treated during the recent outage was unconscionable. Nothing was posted for information before, during or after. No apologies made, no explanations given - NOTHING. Please understand that there have been issues which mods have been taking up with the administration prior to this, but have been ignored also. So understand that it isn't just because of this incident - this spans the past year or more. The way the administration behaved during and after a weeklong outage was simply the straw that broke this camel's heart and back.

I'm sorry to make a fuss and leave, and I will miss y'all dearly (except for the few who will rejoice at my departure ) but I will not participate in something I consider to be wrong - and this is wrong. Most members so not know what goes on "behind the scenes" of a forum and that's the whole idea - that their enjoyment is uninterrupted by problems, arguments, etc. I have refrained until today to say anything because I do NOT approve of disturbing the membership every time I have an opinion! But this is serious and this is too much.

MANY, MANY, MANY blessings to ALL of you!

You have inspired me, given me hope when I felt hopeless, made me ashamed of myself when I was slacking and making excuses, and lifted me up in every way shape and form that an individual can be! You have been a part of my everyday life for years, and I have treasured every minute.

Please know that I will continue thinking of all of you and sending energy to everyone that their journey be filled with wonderful companions along the way.

To the management: you had a good idea, but neglected it. Thanks for how it began, too bad about how it is now, for which I have nothing but contempt.